Tag Archives: novelty real estate

Fugly and Proud Los Angeles Real Estate

It’s Tuesday and that’s not exciting, so we thought we’d share a little bit of immensely-entertaining novelty real estate.

Today’s featured bit of real estate insanity comes to us courtesy of CurbedLA. So far as we know, no one especially famous has lived there, but that’s okay. The disturbing decor is really the “star” here.

For starters, the front lawn is lined with plaster replicas of the David. Never mind the David’s long-standing canonical status as a “masterpiece”, and never mind that masterpieces are inherently one of a kind:

But it gets even better. How, you might ask? Well, the house is full of fake dogs. Ugh. Not only that, but no one bothered to remove them from the listing photos. Also, there’s a giant disembodied ceramic hand in the dining room:


To top it off, the kitchen and backyard create an utterly bizarre contrast to the crazed-but-consistent black-and-white-with-creepy-accessories thing they had going on in the earlier photos.

And what’s this charming abode asking? $2.4 million. Not outrageous considering the neighborhood, but certainly amusing. Let’s hope the fake dogs are included.

Angelyne’s Hideous Hot Pink Condo Actually Sells

CurbedLA recently caught hold of a shocking listing in Malibu – the three-story, unimaginably vulgar, hot-pink decorated condo belonging to beloved Los Angeles icon Angelyne.

If you’ve never heard of her, she’s basically the patron saint of the “famous for nothing” (think Paris Hilton, Camille Grammer, etc).  She rose to “fame” in the 80s and 90s, when billboards and murals began popping up and showcasing her, um, “charms”.

Kudos to Angelyne for making a name for herself (probably not her real name, though). It’s really too bad, though, that when she made her deal with the Devil she let the Devil keep the decorating skills. Take a peek:

It’s upsetting, no?

There is, however, a silver lining (NOT a hot pink lining):

1. This place actually sold for $25K above its listing price. (Um, what? Yeah.)

2. The RealEstalker article about this place when it first went on the market back in November ’10 is ab.so.lute.ly. fab.ul.ous. We always enjoy catching up with the RealEstalker, but this article is particularly enjoyable. Behold, an excerpt:

Listing photos show that at least one of the three guest bedrooms was worked over and put through the wringer of Angelyne’s one-noted and all pink decorative sensibility and includes cotton candy colored walls, matching deep shag carpeting, and a molded plastic bed frame, end tables and dresser set in the shiniest of hot pink a person should never see. Where does a person even buy furniture like that? Seriously, folks, where? Really turning the decorative piss into vinegar is that tawdry, gauzy and two-toned wannabe baldachin that is only made more heart wrenching when seen in conjunction with the pink heart-shaped pillow and pile of discarded clothes on the floor around the bed.

If horrific decorating provides the impetus behind unparalleled pseudo-celeb real estate prose like that, we have to say that we’re fans.

 

Your own private Red Rock Island in the San Francisco Bay

Our last post, also about the Bay Area, was a little bit bleak.  To make up for it, we’re sharing some of the most delightful real estate news we’ve heard in a while: there’s a private island for sale in the middle of the Bay, and it might harbor buried treasure (!!!!!!).

Real estate aficionados with ANY inner child left at all must be absolutely giddy about this listing.  It does cost $22 million, and nobody seems to know if you can actually build a house on it but – buried treasure!  Who cares!

And actually, $22 million for your own island?  That’s totally reasonable.  There are houses in Pacific Heights going for WAY more, right?

Spotlight on Catalina – again!

We just couldn’t resist pointing you in the direction of the L.A. Times’ most recent “Home of the Week”.  Sure, the house is historic, gorgeous, and a landmark in the community – but it also comes equipped with a rather unique backstory.

Rumor has it that the original owner and builder renounced love forever when his fiancee refused to move to the island.  The L.A. Times even reports that in his day, signs that stated “no women allowed” were seen all around the estate.